Hoenn, the Region You Don't Want To Go To
by TheGamerGod333
Summary: In the world of Pokemon, Hoenn is one messed up place. Violence runs the streets and the towns, and Jackuss, the main character is forced to move there from Kanto because of Team Rocket. WARNING: Violence and bad languange is in this story, so be warned.
1. Arrival At LittleShit

Yeah, this fanfiction isn't going to be serious at all and may murder everything you believe about Pokemon. Cause, this is going to be one very messed up fanfic, as I write fallout fanfics. If you know what Fallout is then you probably already know that this fanfic is messed up... and if you don't... go out and buy it. Seriously a great game. This story is not advised for people who love Pokemon, as it's just... messed. up. It contains extreme violence, and very bad language. So... this is your last warning. Seriously, I don't want to warp some kid's mind warped out there who's reading this.

* * *

Prologue...  
_My name is Jackuss. And before you ask... no, it's not pronounced like Jackass._

_And I fucking hate this region. It's crime infested... seriously you can't walk a few steps without getting a gun put in your face. The shopkeepers are insane, and won't leave you alone until you buy something. I fucking hate that bastard Professor Birch... not only because he tried to rape his own daughter May, but because he also keeps knocking at my door at one a.m. asking me to help him bury something. When I ask him what is he burying, he just tells me to shut the fuck up and continue to dig._

_My first pokemon... was absolutely INSANE. He mauled people's faces off and ate them. Damn Torchics, and their Murderous nature... or maybe Birch trained it to be that way... so... there it began... in the back of that goddamned moving truck._

* * *

**Chapter One Arrival at LittleShit**

Jackuss sat in the moving truck waiting patiently for it to arrive at the town that his family was moving to. It came to a sudden stop and the boxes moved and almost crushed Jackuss in the back of the moving truck.

"FUCK!" Jackuss yelled. Jackuss now annoyed, jumped out of the moving truck only to crash into his mother who was about to open the door.

He once again sweared under his breath, his mom heard him and smacked Jackuss for cursing.

"How many times do I have to tell you?!? No cursing!" She yelled, smacking Jackuss over and over.

"I'm sorry! Stop beating me you..." Jackuss stopped dead in his tracks, as he was about to call her a bitch, and he remembered the last time he did that.

Flashback...  
_"Uh... miss? We found your ten-year old son, bruised, bloody, and in the back of a dumpster unconsious, with pan marks all over him. Do you know anything about this?" The policeman asked, beside a bruised, beaten, and bloody Jackuss._

_"No... and if anybody speaks up about it I would hope nothing very bad would happen to them... like being thrown in a ditch and then buried alive..." She said._

_"Well... we'll be on the lookout for whoever did this... son did you see who did this?" The policeman asked, turning around to face Jackuss. Jackuss saw his mother behind the policeman patting the bloody frying pan against her hand._

_"Uh... no I didn't see the person... whoever it was." Jackuss said, not wanting to feel the pain of that frying pan again._

_"Well... we'll be on the lookout for whoever did it." The policeman said, walking away._

_"Wait! Don't you want to stay and eat for dinner?!" Jackuss cried._

_"Son, get in the house." His mom demanded._

_"I'd... rather stay outside and play for a while..." Jackuss said._

_"It's getting late, you need to come inside." His mom said._

_"It's four p.m. in the afternoon!" Jackuss said, checking his clock._

_"I SAID GET IN THE FUCKING HOUSE!" His mom yelled. Jackuss began to cry, and slowly walked into the house. His mother slammed the door behind him, and screams like "NO MOMMY NO!" and "PLEASE IT HURTS!" were coming from their house, but nobody seemed to care. _

Present time...  
"What were you about to say?" His mom said, anger building up in her.

"Uh... greatest mom ever?" Jackuss said.

"That's what I fucking thought. Now go to your room in our new house." His mom said.

"Mom, I'm sixteen..." Jackuss said. Jackuss ran inside the house, as he saw that same look in her eyes that she had when he had called her a bitch.

Jackuss and his mom went into their new house. Jackuss went upstairs to check out his room, and he noticed the gamecube that was sitting next to the TV.

He sat down and began to play the game, saying he was only going to play it for a minute.

*6 Hours later*  
Jackuss' mother came upstairs and broke the gamecube as Jackuss couldn't stop playing it.

"The fuck was that for?" Jackuss yelled.

"It's midnight! Go visit the neighbors!" His mom said.

"...what. You just said it was midnight so... I don't think it's a good time to go visit the..." Jackuss stopped, as yet again she had the look in her eyes. Jackuss knew that something bad was going to happen when he entered their neighbor's house at midnight, but he did it anyway to not be murdered.

Jackuss angrily walked downstairs and out of the house and walked into their neighbor's house. A women saw Jackuss, a stranger entering their home at night, and she grabbed a rolling pin and began to beat him with it.

Jackuss ran up the stairs screaming trying to get away from her. He saw a pokeball at the center of the room, and he ran to it and threw it at the mother who was trying to beat him with the rolling pin. Just then the women's daughter came up the stairs hearing the commotion, and broke it up.

Jackuss explained that he was the next door neighbor, and he was just coming to introduce himself.

"You came inside our house, without knocking to visit us? At midnight?" She said, not believing one word of it.

"Well, my mom told me to... and... bad things happen when I don't do what my mom says." Jackuss said, embarrased.

"You're sixteen years old you shouldn't do everything your mother tells you it's not natural for a teenager to do everything that they're told to." She said.

"Hey why don't you quit judging other people and fuck off. I do everything she says because I don't want to be beaten to death with a frying pan everyday." Jackuss said. She grabbed the rolling pin again and Jackuss ran out of their house.

Jackuss walked over to the forest's entrance and a little girl was there.

"Someone is being attacked outside by a crazy raccoon." She said.

"I'll go look... you go back to your home..." Jackuss said. Jackuss entered the forest, and watched Professor Birch get chased by the rabid raccoon for about a minute, laughing and then he decided he should do something about it.

He saw that Professor Birch had dropped his bag and Jackuss had walked over to look inside of it.

After Jackuss searched the bag for any money, and he found none, he grabbed the Treecko pokeball and threw it at the raccoon to see if it could hurt it. It only made it annoyed, but when he had threw it some strange looking grass pokemon came out.

Jackuss thought it looked stupid, so he put the Treecko back in the pokeball and grabbed the Torchic pokeball and released the Torchic inside to fight the racoon.

Jackuss' Torchic and the Rabid Raccoon began to scratch and growl at each other, until the Torchic left the raccoon in a pile of it's own blood. Professor Birch ran up to Jackuss.

"The fuck is wrong with you? You could of just told the pokemon scare it off... you didn't have to do THAT." He said, pointing to the bloody dead Raccoon.

"What do you mean? It's fainted." Jackuss said.

"The fuck? Are you looking at some other raccoon? That thing is DEAD. It's not breathing, it's in a pool of it's own blood... it's dead!" Jackuss said.

"Nah, it's clearly fainted. And plus... I could have just took all of your pokemon and left you to your fate..." Jackuss said.

" Well, yeah you have a point there... also what's your name? I haven't you seen around Littleshit." Professor Birch said.

* * *

"Oh, and that's another thing, all the towns and places have fucked up names in Hoenn! Even the region's name is fucked up! Hoe-nn? Get it? Hoein?!? You know like Hoeing, like prostitutes? Is it just me who is seeing these fucked up things? Anyways... back to the story..."

* * *

"Jackuss." Jackuss said.

"Jackuss... as in... Jackass?" Professor Birch said.

"Shut up, it's not pronounced that way. And what's your name?" Jackuss asked.

"Professor Birch." Professor Birch said.

"Oh you mean like Professor Bitch, right?" Jackuss asked.

"What?! It doesn't even... okay yeah it does kinda sound like bitch... fuck you Jackass." Professor Birch said.

"Fuck you Professor Bitch. Also, what are you doing out here at midnight anyways?" Jackuss asked.

"Err... studying pokemon." Professor Birch said, nonchalantly kicking a bloody corpse back into the bushes behind him. "Say... can you dig alright? Cause I need some help... digging my lab assistant who was killed by the raccoon before you got here. And... can you not say anything about it, please? Or you never know... a wild raccoon could come and get you." Professor Birch said.

"Uh... okay. I'll help you dig." Jackuss said, nervously. Professor Birch, handed Jackuss a shovel and they dug a hole, and dropped the bloody victim of the "raccoon" in it and covered in dirt.

"Thanks... say... could you come to my pokemon lab in the morning?" Professor Birch asked.

"Okay." Jackuss said, then he went back to his house to sleep, ignoring his angry mom and the woman who had the rolling pin in the other house.

Professor Birch's Pokemon Lab... in the morning...  
"Well considering you used my Torchic without my permission I'm making you pay a small fine of..." Professor Birch was interrupted by Jackuss.

"Woah, woah, woah. I saved you using that pokemon and I helped you bury the victim of that raccoon." Jackuss said.

"SHUT UP! Didn't I tell you not to mention that. Look... keep quiet about it and I'll let you keep the Torchic because you saved me last night from that raccoon and... you have to promise me that you won't say a word about this ever again." Professor Birch said.

"Why? It's not like you killed him." Jackuss said. Just then one of the Lab Aides that was working had just heard that and stopped working and looked up at Professor Birch and Jackuss.

"Damn it. I guess I'll have to murder another one. I mean... bury another victim of rabid raccoons." Professor Birch said, he walked towards the lab aide saying "Hey Kevin can I talk with you for a moment?".

Jackuss named the Torchic, Jackass just because he wanted to be the one who'd call something that for a change. He walked back into the forest, as he didn't feel like going home to hear his mother complain about him visiting their neighbor's house at midnight even though she told him to.

He walked through the bushes and he got attacked by a wild dog (poochyena), that looked like it was once owned but mistreated, as it was angry and it wanted Jackuss blood. Jackuss threw JackAss out to fight the dog.

Lv.5 Jackass vs. the Lv. 2 Wild Dog  
Jackass used scratch, and cut the dog's face, which made it bleed.

The dog whined because of the cut and then it tackled Jackass which only hurt it slightly.

Jackass then scratched the wild dog yet again, which made it bleed more, and the dog ran away as it was hurt too bad.

Jackass the victorious Torchic growled at the retreating dog, and Jackuss wondered how a small bird could defeat a dog that was twice the size of it. Jackuss shrugged, and put Jackass back in his pokeball and continued on.

Jackuss walked by a blue capped kid and he said to Jackuss "If POKEMON get tired, take them to a POKEMON CENTER.".

"Do I know you?" Jackuss asked. Just then the blue capped kid randomly pulled out a gun and demanded THEGAME to give him his money. Just then Jackass came out of his pokeball randomly and on his own and jumped on the blue capped kid's face and started to maul him.

"Holy shit. Go Jackass go!" Jackuss yelled, watching Jackass brutally murder the blue capped kid who was actually a mugger in disguise waiting for people to come into the forest, to give them pokemon advice and then to mug them.

When Jackass was done, the blue capped kid was dead. Jackuss wondered if Professor Birch trained all of his pokemon to murder for him, and then he dragged the body into the bushes.

"Jackass why did you have to kill him?" Jackuss asked, when Jackass the Torchic heard his "nickname" it growled at Jackuss, and the blood dripped down from it's beak.

"Okay... your nickname is now Firebird? Better? Okay now get in the pokeball out of murdering range..." Jackuss said, putting "Firebird" back in his pokeball. Jackuss then continued on.

He had made it to the town of Oldfail. Jackuss was confronted by a shopkeep who had ambushed him and took him by the arm and dragged him to the pokemon mart.

"This is a POKEMON MART. Just look for our blue roof. We sell a variety of goods including POKEBALLS for catching POKEMON. Here, I'd like to have this as a promotional item." The shopkeeper said, handing Jackuss a potion.

"Uh... thank you?" Jackuss said and then he began to walk away.

"Aren't you going to go in and buy something?" The shopkeeper asked him, when he was walking away.

"Uh... no? I don't really need to buy anything right now..." Jackuss said.

"BUT I GAVE YOU A FREE POTION! You're supposed to go in there and buy something!" The shopkeeper said.

Jackuss attempted to walk away, but the shopkeeper pulled out a gun on Jackuss.

"I said... go in and BUY SOMETHING! DO IT BEFORE I FUCKING SPLATTER YOUR BRAINS ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE!" The crazed shopkeeper yelled. Not wanting to get a bullet in his head, Jackuss walked into the shop.

He walked over to the clerk at the counter.

"Hi, would you like to buy anything?" The clerk said politely.

"Uh... I really don't want to buy anything but there's a crazy shopkeeper out there and he made me come in here..." Jackuss said.

"Oh, did he pull a gun out on you?" The clerk asked. When Jackuss nodded, the clerk pulled out a gun on Jackuss.

"You better buy something real quick before I count to three." The clerk demanded. "One..."

"Okay, okay, no need to count... I'm buying something... do you have any pokeballs?" Jackuss asked if the clerk had any pokeballs.

"Oh, I'm sorry we're fresh out. But would you be interested in a brand new awakening?" The clerk said.

"Awakenings? Those are useless when you can just yell at your pokemon to wake up..." Jackuss said, the clerk exploded with anger.

"YOU BETTER JUST BUY THE GODDAMNED AWAKENING!" The clerk yelled. Jackuss bought the awakening, and wondered what was with people in this region with pulling out guns on people.

Jackuss walked out of the pokemart and told the shopkeeper that he had bought a awakening.

"LET ME SEE THE RECEIPT!" The shopkeeper yelled. Jackuss handed him the receipt for the awakening. "Okay, we hope you enjoy your purchase at our friendly PokeMart. Have a nice day." The shopkeeper said, putting his gun away. Jackuss walked away, wondering if everyone in this region was this crazy.

Jackuss was missing Kanto but he and his mom moved because of the Team Rocket problem. He hoped to god there wasn't some gang exactly like them in Hoenn. He also liked Kanto, as it wasn't as nearly as crazy as in Hoein, er... Hoenn. What really bothered Jackuss was that nobody had stopped or tried to interfere with the shopkeeper and the clerk pulling out guns on him.

He walked over to a person who had a jigglypuff beside him and who was standing near him and the shopkeeper the whole time.

"Uh... didn't you see just see what happened over there?" Jackuss asked.

"Yeah. Why?" He asked.

"You... didn't try to stop it or anything? You just watched as it happened." Jackuss said.

"Maybe you don't understand Oldfail, look around. Do you see any businesses or any shops around here other than the pokemart? Because of that our economy is terrible. Half of the people who stand outside all day and night are bums! I mean... why do you think the town's called OldFail? It's and Old town, and it is a Fail." The man explained.

"Is a Fail? That doesn't even make sense, you sir are an idiot." Jackuss said.

"FUCK YOU!" The man yelled. Just then Jackuss kicked the man's Jigglypuff into the pokemart's wall.

"See, that JUST happened, fuckface." Jackuss said.

"JIGGLYPUFF! YOU EVIL BASTARD! YOU'RE A JACKASS!" The man yelled, walking over and picking up his Jigglypuff who was hurt from the kick.

"HEY I GUESS THAT'S WHY MY MOM PUT IT ON MY BIRTH CERTIFICATE HUH?!?" Jackuss yelled. The man ran away to the pokecenter with his hurt jigglypuff.

Jackuss looked around at the people who were staring at him, since he kicked the innocent jigglypuff. Jackuss looked down, and then yelled one word.

"FUCK!" Jackuss yelled.

_**End of Chapter One Arrival at LittleShit**_

* * *

**Wow, I felt my innocence die again just by re-reading all of that. I'll post the next chapter in a few days... adios till then. Be kind and please review. ~TheGamerGod333**


	2. Off to a Hellish Pokemon Journey

**Chapter 2 Off to a Hellish Pokemon Journey**

Jackuss, now irritated, walked towards the route that led out of the town and further into the region, but he was tackled by some crazed researcher guy.

"DON'T COME THROUGH HERE!" The crazed researcher guy screamed.

"Why?" Jackuss asked.

"Because I'm researching A VERY rare pokemon's tracks. So get the fuck away." The crazed researcher said.

"Uh... I need to get through here." Jackuss said.

Just then the crazed researcher pulled out a gun and aimed at Jackuss. Jackuss ran away towards the northern exit to the town which was Route 103.

He walked through the first two groups of bushes and saw the girl that was in the neighbor's house.

"Hi." Jackuss said.

"Let's see... the POKeMON found on ROUTE 103 include..." May said, ignoring Jackuss.

"I said hi..." Jackuss said.

"Oh, you're that guy who "visited" our house after midnight." May said. "Wait... what's in that pokeball?" May asked, noticing it in Jackuss backpack.

"Did you just unzip my backpack and look inside?" Jackuss asked, wondering how she knew about the pokeball in it.

"No I didn't." May said. "Say would you like a completely random pokemon battle?" May asked.

"Well no I really didn't..." Jackuss said.

"I SAID WE'RE GONNA BATTLE BITCH!" May yelled.

"Okayyy..." Jackuss said. He threw out his pokeball that contained FireBird.

May threw her pokeball out which contained "Teh most liekable pokehmon".

A mudkip.

"Now I'm gonna warn you... DON'T look into it's eyes." May said.

"Why what's wrong it's... holy fuck." Jackuss said, looking into the mudkip's eyes even though May had just warned him. He collapsed to whatever he saw in the mudkip's eyes, and the mudkip and Gujin battled it out when May tried to revive Jackuss.

FireBird the Torchic vs. May's Mudkip  
FireBird scratched the mudkip, which covered it's face in claw marks, the mudkip tried to tackle FireBird but he didn't even come any where near tackling FireBird.

FireBird scratched the mudkip again, and this time the mudkip growled at FireBird, which somewhat scared him.

FireBird for the third time due to not knowing any better moves scratched the mudkip, and this time the mudkip didn't miss it's tackle. The mudkip was down to half health.

The battle continued this way to the very end when FireBird left the mudkip crying in the corner due to it's defeat. He didn't liek mudkipz.

Jackuss woke up and put the victorious FireBird back in it's pokeball after it leveled up and learned focus energy.

"Eh, you got lucky." May said. Jackuss noticed May's purse dangling from her arm. Jackuss without thinking snatched the purse and ran off, with her 300 poke dollars.

Jackuss walked back towards the exit of the OldFail town, and he was approached by May.

"I'm gonna tell everyone that you stole my money!" May yelled. May took off running towards LittleShit.

Jackuss had to catch her before she made it back to LittleShit.

He ran and caught up with her and smacked her.

"You won't tell ANYONE." Jackuss said.

"Fine, fine." May said.

Jackuss walked back inside of LittleShit and walked into the lab, to see if he could blackmail Professor Birch anymore.

"Here, take this pokedex, leave the beggining town forever, and go catch all of the pokemon." Professor Birch said. "Oh here, have some balls for once." Professor Birch said, throwing a bag of pokeballs at Jackuss.

"What? Don't you know how wrong that sound just now?" Jackuss asked.

"I SAID GO CATCH ALL OF THE FUCKING POKEMON! NOW FUCKING GO BEFORE THAT RABID RACCOON GETS YOUR ASS!" Professor Birch yelled.

Jackuss walked out of the pokelab shrugging.

"So hey... what are you doing tonight?" Professor Birch asked May.

"Uh... I'm your daughter." May said.

"That doesn't mean anything does it?" Prof. Birch said.

"Um... yeah, it does." May said.

"Come on! Our family has always been inbreeding!" Prof. Birch said.

"Wait what?" May asked.

"Yeah, I'm your mother's brother and uncle..." Prof. Birch said.

"... I don't think I even want to work that one out." May said.

"I'm your..."

"SHUT UP. I don't want to hear what you're about to explain to me." May said.

Outside...  
Jackuss walked out of the town ignoring his mom who was standing out there yelling at him in front of their house.

"HEY! Failure of a son! You forgot your damn shoes you fucking idiot!" She yelled, she had Jackuss' shoes tied to each other.

She chucked them at him, and they hit Jackuss in the head.

Jackuss realized something after rubbing his head. He had been walking around this whole time barefoot.

_So that's why it hurt when I ran._ Jackuss thought.

Jackuss put his shoes on but noticed that there was something taped to his left shoe.

"The hell? Running shoe manual..." Jackuss said.

The manual:  
_"Press the B Button while wearing these RUNNING SHOES to run extra-fast! Slip on these RUNNING SHOES and race in the great outdoors!"_

"What the fuck... press B to run? Does anything make sense in this region?" Jackuss said.

Jackuss ran out of the town, and through the first patch of grass and got attacked by a wild dog in the second patch of grass.

Rabid Dog (poochyena) vs FireBird  
FireBird scratched the poochyhena and the rabid dog tackled FireBird.

FireBird scratched the rabid dog again, and it ran away as it was hurt too bad. (fainted)

FireBird was put back in the pokeball, and Jackuss kept walking through the third patch of grass until he was attacked by a random worm (wurmple).

Jackuss looked at the small wurmple and laughed, and stomped on it, and kept walking through the grass to OldFail.

He entered OldFail, and he was immediately punched by the guy, who's jigglypuff he had kicked.

The guy let the bandaged jigglypuff down and it began to kick Jackuss in the face.

Jackuss punched the jigglypuff, and then got up to headbutt the man.

Both were now knocked out. Jackuss laughed and walked into the pokecenter to get Gujin healed, as he had gotten pretty fucked up from the few last battles with rabid dogs.

The PokeCenter...  
"Doctor! We're losing him!" The nurse cried.

"Give me the defibrillator!" The doctor yelled, beside the bloody mudkip.

"Wait... doctor NO!" The nurse yelled, as the doctor grabbed the defrillibrator.

"Clear!" The doctor was halfway to using the defibrillator on the mudkip.

"NOOOOO! He's a mudkip! He's a water pokemon!" The nurse cried.

The doctor had used the defibrillator on the mudkip, and it began to pulse and shake with electricity.

The flat lining noise was heard throughout the pokecenter.

"NOOOOOOOOOO! Don't you die on me!" The doctor screamed, he pounded on the mudkip's chest severly. "WHY! WHY? Why..." The doctor cried, kneeling.

"Uh... because you used a defibrillator on a water pokemon?" The nurse asked.

"Uhm... can I have my Torchic "FireBird" healed please?" Jackuss asked nervously after witnessing the scene.

FireBird then randomly popped out of his pokeball on his own and began to shake his head furiously.

"Well... would you rather die because of you're injuries, or would you rather take a 50/50 chance of either being healed or being killed like that mudkip over there?" Jackuss asked, pointing to the dead mudkip.

FireBird had a tear running down his face. He got back in the pokeball, and Jackuss handed him to the nurse.

"I'll put your Torchic in the healing machine and..." Jackuss interrupted the nurse.

"Uhm... if you have a healing machine then... why didn't you just put the mudkip in the healing machine?" Jackuss asked.

The nurse pointed up to the sign above the counter.

The sign read "We don't liek mudkipz, so they don't get as good treatment as the other pokemon."

"...isn't that racist?" Jackuss asked.

"Have you ever looked at a mudkip? All they do is... smile... but what's in their eyes is true evil..." The nurse said. She put FireBird's pokeball into the healing machine and it glowed for a minute.

"Here you go." The nurse said. She handed Jackuss FireBird's pokeball to him.

"Thank you." Jackuss said, he began to walk away.

"Have a nice fucking day, asshole." The nurse said.

Jackuss wheeled around.

"What?" Jackuss said.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I healed your pokemon, and you gave me nothing, I guess this is just a free clinic huh?" The nurse said rudely.

"Uh... pokecenters ARE free clinics for pokemon." Jackuss said. "Also... all you did was walk over to a machine and put my pokemon in it. In fact... you don't serve any purpose you racist bitch." Jackuss said.

"Fuck y..." The nurse was interrupted by a doctor.

"He's got a point. If we fire you, we get more money, so pack your shit and leave you bitch." The doctor said.

"Damn it, kid... now I have to go get hired at another pokecenter..." The nurse said.

"Oh hell no. I'm telling every pokecenter that gem that this kid gave to us. All bitchy nurses at the pokecenters are being fired, and the machines are going to be made where you can heal your own pokemon, by yourself." The doctor said.

"...I'll get you for this, kid. **Mark my fucking words.**" The nurse said.

_That doesn't sound good._ Jackuss thought.

He walked out of the PokeCenter.

Jackuss walked up to the center of OldFail where he found the crazed researcher guy from earlier, he was now in the middle of the town crying.

"Uh... I'd ask what was wrong but I think you still have that gun." Jackuss said.

"I finished sketching those tracks of that very rare pokemon..." The researcher cried.

"What pokemon was it from?" Jackuss asked.

"It was from me." The researcher cried.

"Me? There's actually a pokemon called Me?" Jackuss asked.

"...no I mean me." The researcher said.

"Yeah I know. The pokemon called Me, which I've never heard of before..." Jackuss said.

"GOD DAMN IT! Don't you have any sense! It was my tracks! I was sketching the bottom of my own shoes..." The researcher cried.

"...no I don't have any cents, what do you think I am? A change machine? And you were sketching yourself's tracks? What an idiot..." Jackuss said.

"GOD DA... you know what? Just go the fuck away I'm gonna kill myself." The researcher cried.

Jackuss didn't go away, but he stood there.

"Why are you still here?" The researcher asked.

"... do it! Take your gun and place it to your head and end your miserable life!" Jackuss said.

"Aren't you supposed to talk me out of it?" The researcher asked.

"I would if you would actually do it. But you don't have the backbone to shoot yourself in the fucking face! So yet again, DO IT!" Jackuss yelled.

The researcher stared at Jackuss.

"DO YOU WANT ME TO LOAD THE GUN!" Jackuss said, taking the researcher's pistol and bullets from his pocket.

He loaded the bullets into the pistol.

"There. NOW DO IT." Jackuss said, handing the loaded pistol to the researcher.

"I WILL!" The researcher yelled.

"WELL WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING WAITING FOR? DO IT NOW!" Jackuss yelled.

Just then a gunshot echoed through OldFail, and Jackuss was now covered in blood.

"...those bastards who wrote that book lied to me. Reverse psychology doesn't work at all!" Jackuss said, staring at the dead researcher who had shot himself.

Jackuss crouched and began to pilfer through the researcher pockets looking for his money.

**End of Chapter 2 Off to a Hellish Pokemon Journey**

* * *

**Chapter 2 is up. I would tell some person who is whining about killing himself to do that...**

**...**

**What? If they're stupid enough to do it then... why not? Anyways... adios.**


	3. After Washing the Blood

**Chapter 3 After Washing the Blood**

"He could have gave me a warning that he was going to ACTUALLY shoot himself… I would have moved away…" Jackuss said angrily, while swimming in the pond outside of OldFail on Route 102.

He was swimming to get rid of the blood that was now on his clothes because of the researcher killing himself.

Sure, his clothes would be wet, but being soaked in water is better than being covered in another person's blood.

Jackuss got out of the pond swearing under his breath.

"Damn buildings not having plumbing…" Jackuss said, angrily.

He continued to walk along the Route until a blue capped kid ambushed him.

"If you have pokemon with you, then you're an official Pokemon Trainer! You can't say no to my challenge!" The Blue Capped Kid yelled.

"Err… what region are we in? I thought I still had free will… so… no, to your challenge." Jackuss said walking away.

"I SAID YOU CAN'T SAY NO!" The Blue Capped Kid cried. He pulled out a knife, and held it threatingly towards Jackuss.

"Jesus… what's with all you Hoenners pulling out guns and knives on people? Seriously, I really miss Kanto…" Jackuss said.

"Battle me!" The Blue Capped Kid yelled.

"FINE! JESUS…" Jackuss said irritated.

The Blue Capped Kid sent out a deranged pup, and Jackuss sent out Firebird the Torchic.

Firebird scratched the Deranged Pup, and the Deranged Pup tackled Firebird.

Firebird scratched the Deranged Pup, and the Deranged Pup tackled Firebird…again.

"Jesus this gets repetitive…" Jackuss complained.

Firebird scratched the Deranged Pup for a third time, and it fainted in a small pool of blood.

"JESUS CHRIST MAN! MY DOG!" The kid cried.

Jackuss withdrew Firebird and ran, but before he did that, he pickpocketed the kid who was crying over his bloody fainted dog.

He got 80 poke dollars from him and he ran.

He walked through the grass, and he was attack by another Deranged Pup. He threw out Firebird to fight it off.

Firebird scratched the Deranged Pup, and the Deranged Pup tackled the Firebird.

"Seriously? Again?" Jackuss said angrily.

After another battle of scratching and tackling, the Pup was badly weakened.

He threw a pokeball at the deranged pup, and it hit him on the head, it passed out and the pokeball caught him instantly because of it passing out.

_Huh… that was lucky._ Jackuss thought.

He nicknamed the pup "Mauler".

He navigated through the grass, and he was approached by another Blue Capped Kid.

"Did you just become a…" The Blue Capped Kid didn't have time to finish.

"JUST SHUT UP. Let's get this over with." Jackuss said angrily.

The Blue Capped Kid sent out a Rabid Racoon, and Jackuss sent out his Firebird.

Firebird scratched the Rabid Racoon, and then the Rabid Racoon tackled him.

Firebird scratched the Rabid Racoon, and it fainted in a pool of blood.

"Jesus… how sharp are your claws ya ugly bird?" Jackuss said.

Just then Firebird looked behind him at Jackuss and it gazed at him angrily.

Firebird grew stronger from the battle.

"Good thing that was just a random raccoon I picked up." The Blue Capped Kid said.

He sent out a Small Bird, otherwise known as a Taillow.

Firebird scratched the Small Bird which had hurt it pretty badly, and the Small Bird growled in response.

Firebird finished off the Small Bird with another scratch, and it ended up in a pile of blood, fainted.

"MY BIRD! YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD!" The Blue Capped Kid cried.

"Well, not really heartless. As my bird, hurt your bird. It's the way of the animal kingdom, bitch. Now pay up." Jackuss said.

"But we never betted anything on the battle…" The Blue Capped Kid said.

"Yes. Yes we did. You just don't remember." Jackuss lied.

"Well fine…" The Blue Capped Kid said.

The Blue Capped Kid handed Jackuss twenty four poke dollars, but Jackuss shook his head, implying he wanted more.

"More." Jackuss said.

"FINE." The Blue Capped Kid said, handing him another twenty four poke dollars.

Jackuss continued on the path, but he saw two berry bushes.

He began to collect berries from both, but then he stopped when he got two oran berries, as he thought he heard something in the bushes move.

He was cautious for the first time in his life.

However cautiousness didn't do shit for him, when the hiding dog jumped out and tackled him.

He was being bit several times, over and over again, all he felt was pain until he finally kicked the dog off of him.

It tried to run away, but Jackuss was pissed off.

He dragged it back by it's tail, and then he broke the dog's neck.

"Motherfucker…" Jackuss said.

He collected the other pecha berries that were next to the oran berries, but he stopped.

He heard something move again in the bushes.

"MOTHERFUCKER NOT AGAIN!" Jackuss cried.

He ran from the bushes and ran towards the next town through the bushes, but he was attacked by a wild pokemon.

What Jackuss didn't realize, was that the alive thing in the second bush was just a harmless cute kitty cat. The Blue Capped Kid saw him run from the cat and he laughed his ass off.

"Another poochyena? Seriously? I want to fight something else for a change…" Jackuss said, sending Firebird out again.

Firebird was about to use scratch again, but he didn't.

Jackuss was confused at this.

But just then Firebird ran up to the Deranged Pup, and it cut it so many times so fast, it was reduced to a dead bloody remainder of a dog.

Jackuss' eyes opened widely.

Firebird grew stronger from the battle.

He kept walking through the bushes until another wurmple appeared.

Instead of stomping on it, he sent out Firebird. He wanted to catch it.

Firebird used scratch, and the wurmple was hurt badly from it.

He threw a pokeball at it, and it was caught.

"Well… that was easy…" Jackuss said.

He nicknamed the wurmple, "Wormy" for now.

Jackuss walked into the next town and went into the pokecentre. A lot of things were different.

For one there was no nurse, or counter. There was just the pokemon healing machines lined up against the wall.

Jackuss put in his pokemon in one of the healing machines.

They were both healed instantly.

He stepped out of the pokecentre.

This is just the beginning. Jackuss thought.

**End of Chapter 3 After Washing the Blood

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**I told you I'd be back. Well, here it is... I'll try to make another chapter sooner than I did this one.**

**Please post a review if you're bored or feeling nice.**

**Adios. ~TGG333**


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